Friday, October 18, 2013


Why do car locks automatically activate when vehicles reach 15 mph? At best this feature is a deterrent for the remedial daredevil. No one seriously contemplates jumping from a car only to hear the lock and give up the notion thinking, 'Well, maybe next time.'

Why do people put beach stuff in bathrooms? Are they drawing a correlation between bathroom and ocean waters? What a profound insult to oceans, and false praise for sinks and bathtubs! They are not the same! Or is it indulgent self-pity: 'I'll certainly never swim in the Atlantic. Guess I'll put this little bowl of shells on the toilet.'