News Bulletin 12

Iran is going to one up itself in sophisticated censorship by creating its own Internet.  One of the country's major concerns is protection from Western cultural invasion and threats.  For example, sticking ones head in the sand, a popular American expression of embarrassment, is considered a maxim of virtue in Iran.  Abdolmajid Riazi, a former ministry of telecommunications hot shot, has said, 'We want to be more like North Korea.  A real model of intellectual self sufficiency.'

India and Pakistan's latest battle for the border topic is the demilitarization of the Siachen Glacier.  Border talks between the two countries have stalled since the 2008 Mumbai attack because India is still upset many of the people who planned the attack were based in Pakistan.  Troops on the disputed glacier reportedly only care about getting off the freezing hunk of ice, asking 'Who would even want to own this forsaken wasteland in the first place.'

Former International Monetary Fund director Dominique Strauss-Kahn has been house hunting in New York.  He paid millions of dollars in bail money after being arrested for, as the French say, forceful womanizing, and now has to pay for a 24 hour armed guard which requires him to find a place to live.  The down on his luck, out of a job, would be politician is keeping a modest profile with a budgetary cap of 25k per month, but the issue of no one wanting to be his neighbor is complicating the search.

Sticky Sushi

One weekend my friend Kathryn and I tried making sushi.  An honest evaluation of the ingredient scavenger hunt, messy rice, and semi-presentable result would probably conclude the endeavor was unwarranted for someone who is satisfied with sushi that comes in a plastic container from a gas station.

Surprising issue: sushi ingredients are impossible to find.  Trader Joe's or the local co-op, one might assume, would have seaweed wraps.  Nothing could be less true.  Not one sushi ingredient was located at Trader Joe's or the local co-op. 

Also, sushi rice is infuriatingly sticky.  I have reservations about eating sushi again due to concerns about its digestibility. 

Best decision: watching a sushi making video which demystified ingredient placement and rolling technique.

Doth my eyes deceive me?  This is almost the type of picture a foodie blog would feature to chronicle steps in the sushi making process.



Lesson learned: did not realize wasabi is included inside the sushi roll and is not just an optional side.

Moderate success!!!!

More words

Poetaster \n : An inferior poet

Never has a word brought me so much joy.  Since hanging this calendar page above my desk I've experienced daily amusement by the fact we have such a word. 
No longer needed are phrases such as amateur, not very good, boring, uninteresting. 

He is a poetaster.  Enough said.

A Decidedly Non-expert Car Review

Last weekend I went to the Twin Cities Auto Show.  Below is a review chock full of opinions based solely on appearance.

From the side and back the Buick Regal is a classy car, but the front reminds you it's still your grandparent's slightly boring sedan.  A fact that rubs in the horrifying realization you were just admiring a Buick.

The Nissan electric demonstrates how far the auto world has to go in beautifying the design of electric cars.  The Leaf embodies extremely advanced technology and will compel owners to put paper bags over their heads when driving.



There was once a Honda Civic heyday.  All the 2011 designs draw on how Honda looked before that time when it was only recognized as a reliable import.  If you looked up 'Meh.' in the dictionary you would see this car.   

Were all the designers on some kind of union holiday? Send them to WI where they're putting an end to such nonsense. Oooooh yes, inflammatory political statement in a car review.  I know little about unions, but if they're responsible for the Honda, I'm adamantly against them.

BTW the above also applies to all the VW models I can remember.  

Whoa! Germany, your precious little VW just got compared to a Honda. 

Things I did like:

The KIA hybrid.  Fun!  Never mind it probably has the power of an electric wheelchair. 

Keep in mind I also know little about reading 'specs' so the above assessment of the KIA's capabilities could, for better or worse, be untrue.

The Audi A7. 

 Making a hatchback look sophisticated is every designer's nemesis, so anyone who achieves the impossible deserves respect.  (props also to Porsche in this department, and yes their hatchback happened awhile ago, but I didn't go to an auto show that year).


The Cooper Countryman. 

                                                           

This is painful because I was abrasively against it originally, but this is one of the cutest little SUVs ever!  My concern is Mini becoming a whatever brand, like Starbucks - starting off elite but obtainable only to later descend into the reviled abyss of mass production. They should get rid of the goofy extended mini and stop with the regular Cooper and Countryman.

Mind cleanse

I have had enough of trashy television.  Specifically, reality television.

?

Going forward only TV one would watch with a virtuous grandmother is allowed which will mean a radical departure from Housewives, Kardashians, JerseyS and all other ridiculous garbage.  After a shameful diet of far too much of the above, I have had enough and am taking a stand for quality, good etiquette and America before Survivor.

?

Plus, Fact As Old As Time:

After you watch some shows you feel like this:

And after other shows you feel like this:

I'm not against modern television and seriously enjoy reality TV.  Since its inception, the captivating appeal of watching people yell at each other has been named the first Intangible Wonder of the World.  Spectacularly entertaining examples of human disaster.    However, sometimes it is good to look away from the train wreck. 

I've DVRd about 8 episodes of I Love Lucy and my goal is to last the month of April.  Will all this wholesomeness be too sappy?  Probably.  Little House on the Prairie can be sickeningly sweet.

But not as sickeningly sweet as Shirley Temple.  I absolutely cannot stand Shirley Temple.  She makes me feel like the cat and I'm only watching stuff that makes me feel like the baby.

Good moods

There are several things making me very happy right now.

1.  The girl scout cookies I just bought.

These are probably the best cookies in the world and I resisted buying some twice before giving in today.  I am not planning to share.  Someone else who sits across from me at work bought some and did offer to share with everyone in our row.  I turned up my radio and pretended to be especially busy for several minutes.

2.  La traviata

This is one of my favorite operas.  It's easy to listen to and doesn't make you squirmy or impatient for intermission wine.  It's making me especially happy right now because I'm going to Minnesota Opera's opening night performance tomorrow.

3. Museums

Nerd ALERT.  At this moment the gods of history and art, may they live forever, are smiling upon the Twin Cities with glorious blessings of cool museum exhibits.

George Washington: Was Awesome at the Minnesota History Center

    Yes, fine, the actual title is Discover the Real George Washington: New Views from Mount Vernon.

Tutankhamun: The Golden King and the Great Pharaohs at the Science Museum of Minnesota.  Who doesn't love mummies?

Titian and the Golden Age of Venetian Painting: Masterpieces from the National Galleries of Scotland at the Minneapolis Institute of Arts

4. Happy Hour

Meritage is one of my favorite restaurants in St. Paul and they just started hosting a happy hour.  And by 'just' I mean 'several months ago'.  Yes, it's true, sometimes I move slowly, but I'm finally going tonight and am excited about delicious wine and apps. 

An ode to the hat

Before we get to the hats - a follow up on the last post.  The word on my calendar today is hilarious:

grok v: to understand profoundly and intuitively
She chewed her gum with such concentration it appeared she was grokking everything around her. 

So, yes, hats.  I love them.  I grok them.  Sometimes when pondering how to use the extra thousands of dollars I have laying around I surf high end fashion sites looking for hats.  Thank heavens Gucci provides a palatable version of this basic necessity, ensuring one can cover one's head properly and add to even the most fabulous of outfits.